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Yep, Pigs are Flying & Hell is Freezing Over

Yep, Pigs are Flying & Hell is Freezing Over

Sometimes in life we need to do a course correction. Sometimes, we’re required to do things we’re really not all that fond of, but which are simply necessary.

Therefore, it is with humble heart and a little rolling of the eyes that I announce that I’m back on Twitter. Yep. @karenranney1 is my Twitter name.

As far as Facebook I doubt if I’ll ever return to that 13th circle of hell, but never say never. Whenever I’ve said never say never I’ve always had to eat my words. Crow, with a dash of mustard, please.

It’s a long, drawn out story why, but it’s coupled with some good news I can announce in a month or so. I know, don’t you just hate teasers?

I’m also on Instagram – writer_karen_ranney.

It’s been five years, I think, since I was last on Twitter. I might be wrong on the years, but it’s been awhile. I’ve never been on Instagram. Everything’s a learning curve.

I’m going to be on YouTube within a few months – and no, that’s not my news. That should be a fun experiment, though. I’m looking forward to it. I have my channel up, but it hasn’t been published yet, plus I’m still learning my new camera and microphone. Baby steps.

I fully anticipate making an absolute ass of myself from time to time, but I’m a believer in that old adage: nothing ventured, nothing gained.

The Weirdness of Being Me – Keyboards

The Weirdness of Being Me – Keyboards

I’ve confessed on numerous occasions that I’m a tech gadget aficionado. That personality trait shows up in my keyboard consumption.

When I first made the change from a PC to an IMac I unboxed my new computer with trembling hands. I was so excited, but scared, too. I’d only used an Apple machine a few times and was worried about the learning curve.

When I unpacked the keyboard I just stared at it.

Apple keyboard (flat, with tiny keys, in my humble opinion)

Are you flippin’ kidding me?

I’m what they call a production typist. I need systems that allow me to input. The Apple keyboard is still, in my humble opinion, a joke.

So, off I went on a hunt for an ergonomic Apple keyboard.

Hint: they don’t make one. They don’t sanction one. They don’t recommend one. I still think that’s a pretty foolish attitude, but I love my IMac, so off I went again, to find an ergonomic keyboard that would work with Apple. In other words, how do I get the function keys to do the same thing on an Apple?

Hint: they won’t. There’s always a trade off. You will get some functions to work correctly, but others won’t.

I have four different brands of keyboards in my closet. For the last two years I’ve settled on a GoldTouch ergonomic keyboard and it’s worked fine. Until…

GoldTouch keyboard

One day I started working and my fingers were making all kinds of mistakes. Granted, the writing has been rubbed off the keys, but I know where they are. It’s like my fingers were either too plump or they’d shrunk. Something was weird. I went for two weeks like that, making mistake after mistake.

Finally, I pulled out the Kinesis wireless Freestyle2 Blue keyboard out of the closet and voila! I could type again. This keyboard has to be charged occasionally, which is a pain, but at this point I really don’t care.

Kinesis keyboard

I’ve been looking at the GoldTouch, wondering what the heck happened. Why can’t I type on a keyboard I’ve been using for two years straight? I don’t have an answer, other than the keys are definitely different between one keyboard and the next. I’ve been losing weight, maybe my fingers have, too. 🙂

What about you? If you use an Apple machine do you use their keyboard? Do you use an ergonomic keyboard? Why do you think my fingers don’t work? Have you ever had that problem?

Stanley’s New Friend

Stanley’s New Friend

According to Joni, the manager of Pupstop, Stanley’s daycare, he has a new best buddy. It’s Larry, the standard poodle who thinks he’s a small dog. Evidently, he lives with a tiny dog so that’s how he plays. From the following pictures I can only agree.

Notice that Stanley’s the only one in a super duper harness? Let’s just say that Stanley was born to run. Out of the car, onto the street, anywhere the wind blows free in his hair. Plus, the harness has a handle and that has really come in handy.

No, Thank You.

No, Thank You.

Once upon a time people came to your door to sell you vacuum cleaners, encyclopedias, and oodles of kitchen gadgets. The Fuller Brush Company did a huge business selling all kinds of brushes and cleaning tools to housewives.

That was then. This is now.

Society has changed. People consider – okay, I consider – it an imposition for you to knock on my door. I don’t have a No Solicitation sign on the door only because it is unattractive, but if I wanted to buy your product I would. I don’t.

That means I hardly open the door to anyone I don’t know. The only exception was the other day because the guy was dressed like a city worker. Stanley wanted to eat him. I quickly figured out that he was wearing a hard hat and a yellow vest as a costume and that he wanted to sell me a water system. He was the one who left first because he couldn’t be heard over Stanley’s barking.

Good boy.

Last Sunday, twenty-one people were standing in front of my house as one of them approached my door, rang the doorbell, then banged on the screen. Just picture what Stanley did. She didn’t leave right away, either. I didn’t open the door. I find it extremely hard to be rude to people, even if they want me to follow Jesus in their way or admit that I’m going to hell because I don’t. So, it’s better if I don’t engage at all.

After about five minutes of Stanley hysterics the woman left, rejoining the group in front of my house. They moved on to the next neighbor.

I can’t help but wonder if people actually get converts this way. What happens if someone opens the door and invites one of them in? Do the rest follow? Is this really the best use of their time?

Maybe some poor soul who is confined to his house will find the visit a blessing. As far as Stanley and me – we didn’t.

Today’s the Day!

Today’s the Day!

It’s been eight weeks since I began the process of getting new dental implants. Last time, three weeks ago, I approved the final version of everything. They made sure it fastened to the original screws and the new screw. They measured. They gave me a mirror. Everything was cool.


Except that it had to go back to Florida to be finalized. It looked final to me. But, hey, what do I know?

The good thing about all these appointments is that Stanley got to go Doggy Day Care, find some four legged friends, and play.

Today I should get the final implant which means I don’t have to darken the dentist’s door for a very long time – I hope. As far as Stanley, he’ll still get to go back to Doggy Day Care periodically. Hey, you need to sniff derriere from time to time, right?